The Wish & The Battle Inside

Here I am sitting today humiliated by an award, a recognition of my work.. But this time I didn't deserve it, this time I never worked to my potential. Like every person, I too had my dreams big  and small, to make it sometime. I still remember how I longed that before leaving this company I'll carry that Ace award in my hand, and I worked hard for it, struggled for it but it escaped me, I said may be some other time, some other place. But today when I got it, it came to me in a way I least expected and deserved. It came to me just as AN OBLIGATION, A FAVOR..... Let me make it very clear that a men must be judged for what he is, with the same respect for truth, with the same incorruptible vision and treated accordingly. I am proud of my own value. I do not support my life by robbery or by alms, but my own effort, so I DO NOT SEEK TO DERIVE MY HAPPINESS FROM THE FAVORS OF OTHERS, BUT EARN IT BY MY OWN ACHIEVEMENT. My truth is only my motive. My truth and  my own work to achie...

This is that phase of my life which I call as 'walking the street' and believe me it is one of the toughest times of my life. One phase where I am most vulnerable, susceptible to err and well capable of causing hurt. I have resigned from my company, I am under a heavy debt, I have lost my love... blah blah blah.. but even after all these things, I'm confident, happy and at peace. There is some inner energy driving me, what is that I cannot identify but there is definitely something. Something which is giving me courage to fight, something which is stopping me from trailing on the wrong side, something... something. While walking on the street when I see people with no shelter in heavy rains, I can feel the shiver. While on the platform I see the mutilated beggars, I can feel the hunger pangs. While talking to a person who is nurturing a broken heart, I can feel my heart crying. I can feel myself feeling the pain of the world and I can still share my smile....

I read with sorrow but no great surprise about the death of a colleague in a road mishap. His was, just a face to me in the crowd, till the day he departed. The death of a person in his early 30's ,the only breadwinner in the family, was enough to tip his family off. He had many unfinished businesses, many things to work on.. but alas, he is no more. He is survived by his wife, a two year old daughter and a mother. It will take them long to come to terms with the paralyzing loss. Is there any compensation to their loss, a wife lost her husband, a daughter lost her father, a mother lost her only son.. Ohhh God.. you make the stones cry. Hey Almighty I pray to you, I don't know what to ask or expect, you know that better but please give the family the courage and support to sustain in this world of yours. The loss of my colleague plagued me by a myriad of feelings triggered by the fact that it was accidental (and th erefore preventable), that in part it was the result of somebo...

"The prime minister called it a horrific incident, Chidambaram said it showed the brutality and savagery of the Maoists." Yes I am listening, just listening. But now I want to shout to wake you up. Wake-up government you are failing us, the people who trusted you and showed our confidence in you with our votes, can't you see how incapable and hapless you are every single time some terror outfit wants to attack us. What the hell are you there for, on that position. The Dantewada massacre, the 26/11 attack how many more lifes and how much more bloodshed would you want to bathe with. Amazingly the opposition party wants the resignation of Mr Shashi Tharoor for some IPL issues. I knew that cricket is worshipped in India but I never knew that even the politicians we elect are more interested in bat and ball politics rather than caring for the innocent lives. The insurgents are well-trained in gorilla warfare, they have advanced weapons and are highly motivated while our Jaw...

Ms Mayawati does it yet again. Her grandiose display of wealth earlier by means of heavy studded diamond necklaces was not enough to appease her vanity so now she comes with a new display of currency garlands. A huge applause and word of thanks from all the countrymen Ms Mayawati. Mayawati has yet again proved that she and her party members give no regards to the plight of the poor in their own state and the nation. Their profuse wealth is on display every now and then, which is an open challenge to the people everytime, that this is the power that we have by high-end corruption, stop us if you can. If even a single minister of BSP had to plough the farm, lift the loads, work day and night to earn that penny; they would have realized the worth of money. But fortunately for them money comes from all illegal activities, extortions, bribery, murders and all they have to do is to bribe the voters, threaten the people to win the next poll, so this money would keep flowing. I stress on ed...

"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowliness. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~Mark Twain Read it once and associate it with your goal. Read it again and associate it with your love. Read it yet again and associate it with your life. Explore.Dream.Discover. ~ Your goal It might take you a long time before you win in any undertaking. You might have to let go of all your luxuries and joys. You might be faced by a myriad of trying situations. But under all circumstances you need to stay focused, stay true to your commitments and not give up. For every man can dream but to make that dream a reality very few have the courage and willpower. Explore. Explore your goal. Seek the answer for yourself, what do you want to be and why. Dream. Never let go of the vision you have in your mind. Think about it all the time and ...