Saturday, December 4, 2010
If you're happy and you know it
How we keep postponing happiness and make it almost an elusive in an attempt to achieve something else. Some people look around and find a million miseries, some find a million joys... Some find the joys as small and ephemeral and , some capture even the smallest moments as everlasting smiles.
Sunday, November 28, 2010
Read Life
In this book that I read, I found such a desperate struggle for life and such endurance of a human being that I could not surmise it in words. You have to read it and feel it for yourself. And read you must for this is something real and no fiction but just the characters have changed. And while I am just writing it down I can not help and feel what Mariam and Laila will endure next and what will be there final destination. Signing off for now probably I'll be able to gather courage and complete reading this book soon.
Friday, November 26, 2010
Where There Is A Will
Jah chah waha rah (where there is a will, there is a way)... I have heard this one way back in my school, read in stories about it and always thought of it to be some alien concept as I had a will but I missed my way. When I was in school and I got first ranks, I got this good feeling of all the things that I could be and then I never became any of them. I was just carrying my dreams but stuck with life essentials not knowing how and when to make them real.
After I landed up in my new job I decided to fulfill the dream that I carried with me for long.. to teach.. to teach with a motive to achieve still something bigger, to educate the countrymen in an attempt to make my country a better place, with good government, clean environment, peace-loving people and much more. It's a little beginning at the moment with the kids of a school but I am gaining a lot of confidence and belief with each passing day. The bunch of kids I started with were very poor in studies and after putting in a lot of efforts, one day when they were still not able to do simple additions I started to worry and changed my approach, I sat with them counted with them every single digit and reached the answers. A few day of this exercise with the kids and some homework in the end; again, when I started to feel that this could not be achieved, the weakest of the lot, Lalit surprised me with his flawless addition. He could actually add the numbers, he could carry and do the additions and he did got all the sums correct. That day I looked up at the sky and thanked God, I thanked Him for as a human I tend to lose hope but He with His miracles bring back hope alive in me. I was rejuvenated and for the first time I felt that I will be able to find my way.. because where there is a will, there surely is a way and even if on this way lies some darkness, at the end of it will lie the divine light, there lies an extreme sense of joy, of achievement.
P.S.- The pic is a wrapper of the gift that Omkar brought for me-a pen, I returned him the pen and kept the wrapper with me. It looks like a ruby studded bracelet with my name engraved :)
Wednesday, October 27, 2010
Learning Lessons From The One's I Teach
My days could not be much brighter than this, this phase of my life is not Pursuit of Happyness but it is indeed Happiness surrounding me. I could not thank God enough for giving me this phase and I with Him, would also like to thank His most lovely creation- kids.
The moment I enter the class I can see all tiredness rushing out of me and a new zeal fills up my body. I am greeted cheerfully by all and then I start with my regular activity with select kids. By now I have interacted with most of them and have assessed where they stand in terms of their studies. It feels good to know that most of them are good learners and are fairing pretty well. With a few of them, we are working hard and possibly we'll get through. These kids have highly influenced me with their way of living. How I almost forgot that I was a kid once and with time I have grown up into an adult and forgotten almost all the good qualities I was blessed with. There is this kid Ravi to whom I was teaching the other day to read, the sentence was "Malhar is a watchmen" and when I told him what watchmen meant, he said almost flawlessly, "my father is a watchmen", for a moment I was not able to think whether to be happy about his perfect sentence structuring or disappointed by what I just learned. That explains his wearing the same worn out dress each day in school. Mom-dad, I seek your forgiveness here, for the kind of rebellious kid I used to be. I now realize the worth of every effort that you have put in to bring me where I stand today.
The next incident was when two smart kids of our class kept on with their diwali assessment even on a saturday which was meant for enjoyment. I could not resist but ask them why were they not enjoying with class and hell bent to finish whatever work they have in the class itself, and they almost expressed a unison concern of not being able to do homework at home due to space restraints and big family. Ohhh God you have filled me up to my neck.
I am realizing a lot of things which I'll just sum up in few lines:
1) As kids we were never afraid to fall, get up and get going again. What about now, why do we fear even the minor hiccups in our lives.
2) We used to fight and almost on the same day or the very next moment be friends, forgetting everything in a flash. And now we breed hatred in our hearts over the most trivial issues, not being able to let go.
3) How we used to enjoy even the smallest of our happy moments with great elan and now we are not even sure of what could make us happy or don't value a moment of happiness, we yearn for something long lasting.
There is a lot more that I can't express in words.. see it in their faces(below) and try to bring alive the kid in you.
The moment I enter the class I can see all tiredness rushing out of me and a new zeal fills up my body. I am greeted cheerfully by all and then I start with my regular activity with select kids. By now I have interacted with most of them and have assessed where they stand in terms of their studies. It feels good to know that most of them are good learners and are fairing pretty well. With a few of them, we are working hard and possibly we'll get through. These kids have highly influenced me with their way of living. How I almost forgot that I was a kid once and with time I have grown up into an adult and forgotten almost all the good qualities I was blessed with. There is this kid Ravi to whom I was teaching the other day to read, the sentence was "Malhar is a watchmen" and when I told him what watchmen meant, he said almost flawlessly, "my father is a watchmen", for a moment I was not able to think whether to be happy about his perfect sentence structuring or disappointed by what I just learned. That explains his wearing the same worn out dress each day in school. Mom-dad, I seek your forgiveness here, for the kind of rebellious kid I used to be. I now realize the worth of every effort that you have put in to bring me where I stand today.
The next incident was when two smart kids of our class kept on with their diwali assessment even on a saturday which was meant for enjoyment. I could not resist but ask them why were they not enjoying with class and hell bent to finish whatever work they have in the class itself, and they almost expressed a unison concern of not being able to do homework at home due to space restraints and big family. Ohhh God you have filled me up to my neck.
I am realizing a lot of things which I'll just sum up in few lines:
1) As kids we were never afraid to fall, get up and get going again. What about now, why do we fear even the minor hiccups in our lives.
2) We used to fight and almost on the same day or the very next moment be friends, forgetting everything in a flash. And now we breed hatred in our hearts over the most trivial issues, not being able to let go.
3) How we used to enjoy even the smallest of our happy moments with great elan and now we are not even sure of what could make us happy or don't value a moment of happiness, we yearn for something long lasting.
There is a lot more that I can't express in words.. see it in their faces(below) and try to bring alive the kid in you.
Wednesday, October 13, 2010
Taare Zameen Par.. A New Day In My Life
Today I finally started off with my first day of TFI volunteer, at a proper school in Pune. Got up early and by 7.30 I was in action.. I reached this school at a calm place surrounded by greenery but this green was not managed, it covered half of what the school termed as a playing ground. Some kids here had broken slippers, some had no uniforms and some even had no pencils to write.. My own school days flashed in my mind and down from memory lane I remembered how I used to throw tantrums about the kind of pencil box, lunch box, bag I wanted to carry at school. These kids can't afford the tantrums. I lost and broke hundreds of bottles in school and every time got a new Milton one but they carry with them not to be reused cold-drink bottles. I was there till 10 and had to leave then for my regular office.. I so wished to stay there, it feels like an unfinished business.
The fellows Kaushik and Swati are doing an excellent job there. I had four weak ones, lagging from the rest of the class due to their need of extra attention. Gaurav, Sumit, Dutta and Lalit the kids whom I handled separate from the class today for 2 hours. Of which the three Gaurav, Sumit and Dutta had the enthusiasm of doing things and they responded very well, these weak pupils they are good just had to be guided in a right way and that's what I'll try to do but Lalit lacked the fervor, a real special case who needs a little more attention. The fellows are correct they can't manage time for a few of them, when they have a class of 60 to handle. I wish I can settle in with a approach where I could attract these kids to books rather then make it a compulsion for them. Why I say so is because with kids attraction works (lol it works with everyone), so I just want to attract them towards something good and soon. I don't have a magic wand in my hand to do that but I have a will. God, please help me.
Friday, September 24, 2010
CommOnWealth 2010 & The Ayodhya Verdict: Foreseeing a BIG TREASON
Quoting from a newspaper: "India is being shamed globally. It has been shamed by politicians and officials who have been exposed as callous and inept, and possibly* corrupt. Now India stands humiliated. The world knows the bridge we build collapse; that we cannot even keep loos clean. Who is responsible for the national shame? The guilty must be identified and brought to book. It may not store our reputation, but it atleast will show that we, as a nation, value our honour."
Some remarkable statements made by the Indian officials:
Lalit Bhanot(OC Secy Gen)- It is not such a big issue which we should be ashamed of... Westerners have different standards(of hygiene), we have different standards.
Sheila Dixit (Delhi's Chief Minister), Suresh Kalmadi(OC Boss), Jaipal Reddy and MS Gill(central ministers) are either trying to hide behind the closet or prooffering ridiculous excuses in order to explain away their incompetence.
Every inch of their soul is plagued by corruption and these people are far dangerous than the zombies of any hollywood flick. I have not much to add today, I foresee a BIG TREASON awaiting every Indian on the 28th Sep,2010 and to cover the shame of Commonwealth these people are going to riot on Ayodhya issue.
I swear if this time bloodshed happens I won't hide in my house to stay safe but I'll come on the street to fight you. I won't let you burn houses in the name of caste, I won't let you create a divide in a single heart, I won't let you kill.
You (the politicians) dare not break the barrier this time, dare not challenge the COMMON MAN this time.
Friday, August 20, 2010
A Goodbye
Moving on... is what you say but for me it was a 'bereavement'. This is what happens to me when I get connected. Is connection good or bad? Depends... how you take it. For me connection comes from heart. I came here with a friend and when I left I had so many people around me who brought tears in my eyes while saying goodbye. Being a man I had to control my emotions and move on without tears in my eyes...
MOVE ON.
This is the second time when I felt like moving away from family...
Nitin Sir you became a father figure for me.
Prashant Sir that calmness you carried, you are a gem.
Ketan Sir practicality and compassion... my first PM.
Prem Sir for being there, a brother whom I never had, a brother who fought with me, debated with me.
Sudip, Vinit, Sid for being the friends who kept me alive, my naughtiness going... you smiled at my first imperfection, I adopted that imperfection as a part of me, and captured your smiles.
Yogesh, Jaspal, Giridhar, Kolan for being my teammate.. I learnt how to be good at what I do.
Julius, Parinita, Anna, Prakash, Anthony, Shama, Pratibha, Jacob.. a very short, a very short duration but OMG why could I feel my heart crying while saying a goodbye and I rushed off, I wear specs and my eyes are weak, they fail to control the water flow.
And ohhh so many more names, you got my mail... yes I got connected, I could not meet all of you and I could not describe all of you, but trust me.. when I'll be THERE I'll come to you and we'll celebrate. Yet another reason for being there because I want to come back to you. The spark of simplicity and innocence which I missed in this cunning world, I saw it there in you. No masks, no pretensions, JUST YOU in a SIMPLE way BEING YOU... You made my world beautiful and if you at any time need a friend, I'll be there at one call... do call me.
I am still fighting off my tears while writing this... and no, not emotional but being me, the way I am.
I'LL MISS YOU.
Saturday, August 14, 2010
आज़ादी मैं तुझको ढूंढ लाऊंगा
ये जो आज़ादी है वो अभी अधूरी है, पराई है,
इस आज़ादी पर तो शहीदों की भी आंख भर आई है ||
उन्होंने क्रांति की मशाल से देश को आज़ादी दिलाई थी,
सपना था उनका देश को मशाल से रोशन करने का,
हमने तो उस मशाल से देश को आग लगाई है |
ये जो आज़ादी है वो अभी अधूरी है, पराई है,
इस आज़ादी पर तो शहीदों की भी आंख भर आई है ||
वादा है मेरा ऐ आज़ादी मैं तुझको ढूंढ लाऊंगा,
क्रांति की एक मशाल मैं भी जलाऊंगा..
राख कर दूंगा उसमे मैं बुराई और पाप का
नामोनिशान मिटा दूंगा भ्रष्टाचार के दाग का..
चीर के रख दूंगा छाती उसकी जो तुझे विभाजित करेगा
एक युद्ध अंग्रेजो से था अब अन्याय से युद्ध मैं लडूंगा.
न आतंकी राज होगा, न पैसे की माया चलेगी
देश है ये मेरा ये, इसमें शांति और प्यार की गंगा बहेगी..
खेत में किसान के सफलता की फसल लह-लहराएगी
मजदूर जब मेहनत करेगा तो खुशियाँ उसके आँगन आएँगी..
ये जो आज़ादी है वो अभी अधूरी है, पराई है,
इस आज़ादी पर तो शहीदों की भी आंख भर आई है ||
वादा है मेरा ऐ आज़ादी मैं तुझको ढूंढ लाऊंगा,
क्रांति की एक मशाल मैं भी जलाऊंगा
अब तो आज़ादी का जशन मैं तब ही मनाऊंगा...
इस आज़ादी पर तो शहीदों की भी आंख भर आई है ||
उन्होंने क्रांति की मशाल से देश को आज़ादी दिलाई थी,
सपना था उनका देश को मशाल से रोशन करने का,
हमने तो उस मशाल से देश को आग लगाई है |
ये जो आज़ादी है वो अभी अधूरी है, पराई है,
इस आज़ादी पर तो शहीदों की भी आंख भर आई है ||
वादा है मेरा ऐ आज़ादी मैं तुझको ढूंढ लाऊंगा,
क्रांति की एक मशाल मैं भी जलाऊंगा..
राख कर दूंगा उसमे मैं बुराई और पाप का
नामोनिशान मिटा दूंगा भ्रष्टाचार के दाग का..
चीर के रख दूंगा छाती उसकी जो तुझे विभाजित करेगा
एक युद्ध अंग्रेजो से था अब अन्याय से युद्ध मैं लडूंगा.
न आतंकी राज होगा, न पैसे की माया चलेगी
देश है ये मेरा ये, इसमें शांति और प्यार की गंगा बहेगी..
खेत में किसान के सफलता की फसल लह-लहराएगी
मजदूर जब मेहनत करेगा तो खुशियाँ उसके आँगन आएँगी..
ये जो आज़ादी है वो अभी अधूरी है, पराई है,
इस आज़ादी पर तो शहीदों की भी आंख भर आई है ||
वादा है मेरा ऐ आज़ादी मैं तुझको ढूंढ लाऊंगा,
क्रांति की एक मशाल मैं भी जलाऊंगा
अब तो आज़ादी का जशन मैं तब ही मनाऊंगा...
Wednesday, August 11, 2010
The Speech, The End, The Beginning
(My last speech at Hexmaster's; the first time when I spoke and heard my own voice and felt that yes I can address the people. It had my feelings and concerns which I expressed in my blogs. This is not my best speech; the best will be the one when instead of me, the people will speak. But nonetheless it is a beginning..)
Master of Ceremony, Evaluators, Fellow HexMasters, Respected Guests, Good Afternoon – I am Rajat Maheshwari – and I will be giving my organized speech today. Today I will talk about ‘my take on Karmbhumi- the workplace and the nation, and Me’.
Before I go ahead I want to set stage for a little exercise through a story. A master of martial arts asked Bruce Lee to teach him everything Bruce knew about martial arts. Bruce held up two cups, both filled with liquid. “The first cup,” said Bruce, “represents all of your knowledge about martial arts. The second cup represents all of my knowledge about martial arts. If you want to fill your cup with my knowledge, you must first give me some space in your cup of knowledge.”
Listen to me with all ears. Give my words a little space in your mind and your heart.
I’ll start with a few lines on the terrorist’s attacks on 26/11/2008 Go back into that time think about it… think about the bloodshed…. think about the culprits-the terrorists-the politicians-the government servants-the people…. think about the rage, the pain in your heart then…. and today….
“Kuch din ka wo josh tha, Kuch din ka wo rosh tha,
Kuch din ke liye khoon chala aur khoon chal ke ruk gaya…
Kuch pal ke wo jazbaat the, kuch pal ko aankhen nam thi,
Kuch pal ke liye khoon chala aur khoon chal ke ruk gaya…
Kuch aag lagi thi dil me, kuch aag lag ke bujh gayi,
Kuch awaaz uthi thi dil me aur awaaz uth kar dab gayi,
Kuch shabd dil ko chubh gaye, kuch dil cheer ke nikal gaye,
Kuch kar gujarne ko khoon chala aur khoon chalk ke ruk gaya…”
How many times… just how many times we decide to take a stand, try to do something and then forget about it, give it up, let it pass by. WHY??
Why don’t we do it?
At this point pause to take stock of your own position. What is that, that one thing that you always wanted to do? Why haven’t you done it, WHY?
30 secs think about it.
If u want to be as good sportsman as Sachin, you need to play and score like him.
If you want to be as famous as Amitabh Bachchan, you need to act like him.
If you want to be as rich as Bill Gates, then you need to earn like him.
If you want to erect your own statues all over the state, you need to be as powerful as Mayawati.
The statement is simple if you want something that you never had; you’ve to do something you have never done.
I want to be a politician and today I am a techie… but my values and my path are intact. “Jagah badlegi tevar nahi”
As a techie, I love the place where I work, I love my first company. This is the place where, from an amateur I became a professional. I will never forget my first lessons, the guidance of the able men with whom I worked. Like every person, I too have my dreams big and small, to make it sometime. I still remember how I longed that before leaving this company I'll carry that excellence award in my hand, and I worked hard for it, struggled for it but it eluded me, I thought may be some other time, some other place…
If any recognition comes to me it should not come as an obligation, as a favor but by my work, my efforts. A man needs to be judged for what he is, with the same respect for truth, with the same incorruptible vision and treated accordingly.
I do not support my life by robbery or by alms, but my own effort, so I DO NOT SEEK TO DERIVE MY HAPPINESS FROM THE FAVORS OF OTHERS, BUT EARN IT BY MY OWN ACHIEVEMENT. My truth is only my motive. My truth and my work to achieve it in my own way… I am not serving anything, I am not serving anyone. I am living for myself. And only by living for myself I am able to achieve things. My work is my valentine.
At work when I was faced with a situation where I had to choose between my job and my values, I chose my values. I had to walk the difficult path to reach the beautiful destination. For me happiness lies not only in the mere possession of money, it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of putting in those efforts which generated results. The joy and moral stimulation of work should never be forgotten.
And now I’ll talk about my country, the path is the same. A country is guided by its able leaders. However much I love my country, my home, my motherland it’s not a blind love there are things which I want to change in my country, there is a system which I see as wrong and I wish to correct. No matter where you are, no matter what your situations are if there is something wrong raise your voice against it; fight it. Only a foolish optimist can deny the dark realities of the moment.
But the problem is we have learned to live with ‘wrongs’. We head beat over the sorry state of affairs instead of exploring the solutions. That’s not my job, that’s not my responsibility, that’s what we say. We refuse to suffer from all depravations and refuse to raise our voice. And when it becomes too much, we crib.
Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong…. If I say that a 100 times or a 1000 the situation will not change.
If you’ll crib, if you’ll complain, that the evil is prevailing over the good; it is because there is no good on the other side to take on the battle. Those who are corrupts, are working so hard and taking so much pain, to keep the corruption not just alive but augmenting. That’s why they have the last say; the final victory… no one is defending the morality. It is the human spirit that defines the lives of a nation.
When I hear that we will never overcome the corruption prevalent in our system, when I hear that we will never overcome the divides in my country, when I hear that we can’t do it…. I just have to say,
"Ye karmbhumi Kuruksheetra ka maidan hai, saamne burai ke 100 Kaurav khade hai,
Utar maidan me tu sacchai ki gada aur imandari ka gandiv lekar,
Saarthi to Krishna khud ban jayenge
Saarthi to Krishna khud ban jayenge”
P.S.- I will like to thank Parinita, the founder of the Hexmaster's who helped me with my speech preparation, without her help my words would not have met the purpose and I will like to thank all the Hexmaster's for being such a wonderful companion in my journey.
Master of Ceremony, Evaluators, Fellow HexMasters, Respected Guests, Good Afternoon – I am Rajat Maheshwari – and I will be giving my organized speech today. Today I will talk about ‘my take on Karmbhumi- the workplace and the nation, and Me’.
Before I go ahead I want to set stage for a little exercise through a story. A master of martial arts asked Bruce Lee to teach him everything Bruce knew about martial arts. Bruce held up two cups, both filled with liquid. “The first cup,” said Bruce, “represents all of your knowledge about martial arts. The second cup represents all of my knowledge about martial arts. If you want to fill your cup with my knowledge, you must first give me some space in your cup of knowledge.”
Listen to me with all ears. Give my words a little space in your mind and your heart.
I’ll start with a few lines on the terrorist’s attacks on 26/11/2008 Go back into that time think about it… think about the bloodshed…. think about the culprits-the terrorists-the politicians-the government servants-the people…. think about the rage, the pain in your heart then…. and today….
“Kuch din ka wo josh tha, Kuch din ka wo rosh tha,
Kuch din ke liye khoon chala aur khoon chal ke ruk gaya…
Kuch pal ke wo jazbaat the, kuch pal ko aankhen nam thi,
Kuch pal ke liye khoon chala aur khoon chal ke ruk gaya…
Kuch aag lagi thi dil me, kuch aag lag ke bujh gayi,
Kuch awaaz uthi thi dil me aur awaaz uth kar dab gayi,
Kuch shabd dil ko chubh gaye, kuch dil cheer ke nikal gaye,
Kuch kar gujarne ko khoon chala aur khoon chalk ke ruk gaya…”
How many times… just how many times we decide to take a stand, try to do something and then forget about it, give it up, let it pass by. WHY??
Why don’t we do it?
At this point pause to take stock of your own position. What is that, that one thing that you always wanted to do? Why haven’t you done it, WHY?
30 secs think about it.
If u want to be as good sportsman as Sachin, you need to play and score like him.
If you want to be as famous as Amitabh Bachchan, you need to act like him.
If you want to be as rich as Bill Gates, then you need to earn like him.
If you want to erect your own statues all over the state, you need to be as powerful as Mayawati.
The statement is simple if you want something that you never had; you’ve to do something you have never done.
I want to be a politician and today I am a techie… but my values and my path are intact. “Jagah badlegi tevar nahi”
As a techie, I love the place where I work, I love my first company. This is the place where, from an amateur I became a professional. I will never forget my first lessons, the guidance of the able men with whom I worked. Like every person, I too have my dreams big and small, to make it sometime. I still remember how I longed that before leaving this company I'll carry that excellence award in my hand, and I worked hard for it, struggled for it but it eluded me, I thought may be some other time, some other place…
If any recognition comes to me it should not come as an obligation, as a favor but by my work, my efforts. A man needs to be judged for what he is, with the same respect for truth, with the same incorruptible vision and treated accordingly.
I do not support my life by robbery or by alms, but my own effort, so I DO NOT SEEK TO DERIVE MY HAPPINESS FROM THE FAVORS OF OTHERS, BUT EARN IT BY MY OWN ACHIEVEMENT. My truth is only my motive. My truth and my work to achieve it in my own way… I am not serving anything, I am not serving anyone. I am living for myself. And only by living for myself I am able to achieve things. My work is my valentine.
At work when I was faced with a situation where I had to choose between my job and my values, I chose my values. I had to walk the difficult path to reach the beautiful destination. For me happiness lies not only in the mere possession of money, it lies in the joy of achievement, in the thrill of putting in those efforts which generated results. The joy and moral stimulation of work should never be forgotten.
And now I’ll talk about my country, the path is the same. A country is guided by its able leaders. However much I love my country, my home, my motherland it’s not a blind love there are things which I want to change in my country, there is a system which I see as wrong and I wish to correct. No matter where you are, no matter what your situations are if there is something wrong raise your voice against it; fight it. Only a foolish optimist can deny the dark realities of the moment.
But the problem is we have learned to live with ‘wrongs’. We head beat over the sorry state of affairs instead of exploring the solutions. That’s not my job, that’s not my responsibility, that’s what we say. We refuse to suffer from all depravations and refuse to raise our voice. And when it becomes too much, we crib.
Wrong, wrong, wrong, wrong…. If I say that a 100 times or a 1000 the situation will not change.
If you’ll crib, if you’ll complain, that the evil is prevailing over the good; it is because there is no good on the other side to take on the battle. Those who are corrupts, are working so hard and taking so much pain, to keep the corruption not just alive but augmenting. That’s why they have the last say; the final victory… no one is defending the morality. It is the human spirit that defines the lives of a nation.
When I hear that we will never overcome the corruption prevalent in our system, when I hear that we will never overcome the divides in my country, when I hear that we can’t do it…. I just have to say,
"Ye karmbhumi Kuruksheetra ka maidan hai, saamne burai ke 100 Kaurav khade hai,
Utar maidan me tu sacchai ki gada aur imandari ka gandiv lekar,
Saarthi to Krishna khud ban jayenge
Saarthi to Krishna khud ban jayenge”
P.S.- I will like to thank Parinita, the founder of the Hexmaster's who helped me with my speech preparation, without her help my words would not have met the purpose and I will like to thank all the Hexmaster's for being such a wonderful companion in my journey.
Monday, July 19, 2010
The Award, The Humiliation
Here I am sitting today humiliated by an award, a recognition of my work.. But this time I didn't deserve it, this time I never worked to my potential.
Like every person, I too had my dreams big and small, to make it sometime. I still remember how I longed that before leaving this company I'll carry that Ace award in my hand, and I worked hard for it, struggled for it but it escaped me, I said may be some other time, some other place. But today when I got it, it came to me in a way I least expected and deserved. It came to me just as AN OBLIGATION, A FAVOR.....
Let me make it very clear that a men must be judged for what he is, with the same respect for truth, with the same incorruptible vision and treated accordingly. I am proud of my own value. I do not support my life by robbery or by alms, but my own effort, so I DO NOT SEEK TO DERIVE MY HAPPINESS FROM THE FAVORS OF OTHERS, BUT EARN IT BY MY OWN ACHIEVEMENT. My truth is only my motive. My truth and my own work to achieve it in my own way. I am not serving anything or anyone. I am living for myself. And only by living for myself I am able to achieve things. My work is my glory. I am no parasite who needs others to feed upon.
You say that even after deploying good resources, even after agreeing to all their demands, the work is not getting done, the project is still in a mess. You don't have any answer.. I have one but to which you refuse to listen. Do not cry that it is my duty to serve you, I do not recognize such duty. You don't own me. You went on telling me that your code was noble, but the resources are not good enough to practice it. But I rose to ask the question: Good?-by what standard? Here man can survive without gaining knowledge, without working hard but by goodwill with his bosses. I refuse to work on these terms, I refuse to be humiliated. If you cannot recognize the worth of my work, I refuse to work.
P.S.- It is not because that I have resigned so I am writing this today. I resigned much before I had any job offer in my hand and I got an offer much later. I was worried, I was a little scared but believe me if you trust yourself and your ability to work, you won't ever go starving.
P.P.S.- By saying what I said I do not mean to say that I do not love the place where I work, I love my first company. This is the place where I have nurtured from being an amateur to a professional. I won't forget my first lessons, I won't forget the guidance of the able men with whom I have worked and I'll live by my values, and whatever I have done and will do.. is due to a simple reason that I still love.... How to express.. it is simply like I love my country, my adobe, my motherland but still there are things which I want to change in my country, there is a system which I see as wrong and I wish to correct.
Like every person, I too had my dreams big and small, to make it sometime. I still remember how I longed that before leaving this company I'll carry that Ace award in my hand, and I worked hard for it, struggled for it but it escaped me, I said may be some other time, some other place. But today when I got it, it came to me in a way I least expected and deserved. It came to me just as AN OBLIGATION, A FAVOR.....
Let me make it very clear that a men must be judged for what he is, with the same respect for truth, with the same incorruptible vision and treated accordingly. I am proud of my own value. I do not support my life by robbery or by alms, but my own effort, so I DO NOT SEEK TO DERIVE MY HAPPINESS FROM THE FAVORS OF OTHERS, BUT EARN IT BY MY OWN ACHIEVEMENT. My truth is only my motive. My truth and my own work to achieve it in my own way. I am not serving anything or anyone. I am living for myself. And only by living for myself I am able to achieve things. My work is my glory. I am no parasite who needs others to feed upon.
You say that even after deploying good resources, even after agreeing to all their demands, the work is not getting done, the project is still in a mess. You don't have any answer.. I have one but to which you refuse to listen. Do not cry that it is my duty to serve you, I do not recognize such duty. You don't own me. You went on telling me that your code was noble, but the resources are not good enough to practice it. But I rose to ask the question: Good?-by what standard? Here man can survive without gaining knowledge, without working hard but by goodwill with his bosses. I refuse to work on these terms, I refuse to be humiliated. If you cannot recognize the worth of my work, I refuse to work.
P.S.- It is not because that I have resigned so I am writing this today. I resigned much before I had any job offer in my hand and I got an offer much later. I was worried, I was a little scared but believe me if you trust yourself and your ability to work, you won't ever go starving.
P.P.S.- By saying what I said I do not mean to say that I do not love the place where I work, I love my first company. This is the place where I have nurtured from being an amateur to a professional. I won't forget my first lessons, I won't forget the guidance of the able men with whom I have worked and I'll live by my values, and whatever I have done and will do.. is due to a simple reason that I still love.... How to express.. it is simply like I love my country, my adobe, my motherland but still there are things which I want to change in my country, there is a system which I see as wrong and I wish to correct.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
The Complexity Of Simplicity
This is that phase of my life which I call as 'walking the street' and believe me it is one of the toughest times of my life. One phase where I am most vulnerable, susceptible to err and well capable of causing hurt. I have resigned from my company, I am under a heavy debt, I have lost my love... blah blah blah.. but even after all these things, I'm confident, happy and at peace. There is some inner energy driving me, what is that I cannot identify but there is definitely something. Something which is giving me courage to fight, something which is stopping me from trailing on the wrong side, something... something.
While walking on the street when I see people with no shelter in heavy rains, I can feel the shiver. While on the platform I see the mutilated beggars, I can feel the hunger pangs. While talking to a person who is nurturing a broken heart, I can feel my heart crying. I can feel myself feeling the pain of the world and I can still share my smile. Now I am coming face to face with myself, now I am coming face to face with that something. I am not just a salaried employee of an organization and I am not just a person ranting about an unfair life. I am one who is gifted, gifted with a human life and I am the change, the change that I wanted to see in this world.
Why I am SPEAKing UP this is because if tomorrow I achieve my dreams, I succeed; I need to remember every day of my journey. But if my dreams are delayed, I'll won't give up and that's what I resolve, I'll have faith in the God who resides in my heart, I'll have faith in myself and I won't do anything which I repent afterwards. Every single day, I'll try, I'll work and I'll sweat for getting to MY DESTINATION, MY LOVE, MY LIFE, MY DREAMS, MY AMBITIONS.
I AM AT LIFE'S COMPLEX PHASE
WITH A SIMPLE SMILE ON MY FACE.
While walking on the street when I see people with no shelter in heavy rains, I can feel the shiver. While on the platform I see the mutilated beggars, I can feel the hunger pangs. While talking to a person who is nurturing a broken heart, I can feel my heart crying. I can feel myself feeling the pain of the world and I can still share my smile. Now I am coming face to face with myself, now I am coming face to face with that something. I am not just a salaried employee of an organization and I am not just a person ranting about an unfair life. I am one who is gifted, gifted with a human life and I am the change, the change that I wanted to see in this world.
Why I am SPEAKing UP this is because if tomorrow I achieve my dreams, I succeed; I need to remember every day of my journey. But if my dreams are delayed, I'll won't give up and that's what I resolve, I'll have faith in the God who resides in my heart, I'll have faith in myself and I won't do anything which I repent afterwards. Every single day, I'll try, I'll work and I'll sweat for getting to MY DESTINATION, MY LOVE, MY LIFE, MY DREAMS, MY AMBITIONS.
I AM AT LIFE'S COMPLEX PHASE
WITH A SIMPLE SMILE ON MY FACE.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
The Road Mishap
I read with sorrow but no great surprise about the death of a colleague in a road mishap. His was, just a face to me in the crowd, till the day he departed. The death of a person in his early 30's ,the only breadwinner in the family, was enough to tip his family off. He had many unfinished businesses, many things to work on.. but alas, he is no more. He is survived by his wife, a two year old daughter and a mother. It will take them long to come to terms with the paralyzing loss. Is there any compensation to their loss, a wife lost her husband, a daughter lost her father, a mother lost her only son.. Ohhh God.. you make the stones cry. Hey Almighty I pray to you, I don't know what to ask or expect, you know that better but please give the family the courage and support to sustain in this world of yours.
The loss of my colleague plagued me by a myriad of feelings triggered by the fact that it was accidental (and therefore preventable), that in part it was the result of somebody’s negligence (at the time the county was trying to develop new infrastructure, better roads, flyovers -for better traffic control, he was run over by some vehicle), and that it seemed to me that it was contrary to all natural laws – parents are supposed to die before children, not the other way around.
His sudden death left me feeling shaken, unsure and vulnerable. Life is so unjust and intolerable at times.
The same question rings my mind again and again, what if tomorrow is the day when I die?? Since death is not in my hand but my life is, let me make more out of life before life takes me to the end
Wednesday, April 14, 2010
76 Soldiers Killed By Naxalities- The Misleading Headlines
"The prime minister called it a horrific incident, Chidambaram said it showed the brutality and savagery of the Maoists." Yes I am listening, just listening. But now I want to shout to wake you up.
Wake-up government you are failing us, the people who trusted you and showed our confidence in you with our votes, can't you see how incapable and hapless you are every single time some terror outfit wants to attack us. What the hell are you there for, on that position. The Dantewada massacre, the 26/11 attack how many more lifes and how much more bloodshed would you want to bathe with. Amazingly the opposition party wants the resignation of Mr Shashi Tharoor for some IPL issues. I knew that cricket is worshipped in India but I never knew that even the politicians we elect are more interested in bat and ball politics rather than caring for the innocent lives.
The insurgents are well-trained in gorilla warfare, they have advanced weapons and are highly motivated while our Jawans lack even the basic amenities to stay fit and alive forget about standard weaponry and motivation.
And you don't want to deal with strong military strategy to defeat the naxals. Why?
"Saala... kya jawan sirf marne ke liye hi military me bharti hota hai aur neta sirf rishwatkhori ke liye politics join karta hai"
The naxals are gaining ground because the people are poverty struck, their are no proper land reforms in place, poor people are being oppressed and justice is absent at every facet of our society. A whirlwind of social reforms is required.
1) Generate employment.
2) Built proper infrastructure in naxal-affected areas.
3) Each State should have strong intelligence agencies and well-trained paramilitary forces to deal with localized insurgency or other security issues.
4) Educate the people who have been supporting naxals so that they retrospect.
Hello Mr Minister are you listening... you are responsible for the death of our soldiers. Ab to jaag jao....
Thursday, March 18, 2010
Mayawati -- steward of DAULAT not DALIT
Ms Mayawati does it yet again. Her grandiose display of wealth earlier by means of heavy studded diamond necklaces was not enough to appease her vanity so now she comes with a new display of currency garlands. A huge applause and word of thanks from all the countrymen Ms Mayawati. Mayawati has yet again proved that she and her party members give no regards to the plight of the poor in their own state and the nation. Their profuse wealth is on display every now and then, which is an open challenge to the people everytime, that this is the power that we have by high-end corruption, stop us if you can. If even a single minister of BSP had to plough the farm, lift the loads, work day and night to earn that penny; they would have realized the worth of money. But fortunately for them money comes from all illegal activities, extortions, bribery, murders and all they have to do is to bribe the voters, threaten the people to win the next poll, so this money would keep flowing.
I stress on educating the uneducated because of this very reason, may be people will learn to differentiate the right from the wrong after proper education. They might see and aid in preventing the prevalent corruption in the nation and huge amount of money which is now spent in a politicians luxuries would find a proper route and can be utilized for public welfare. Corruption is worse than the Britishers with whom we fought for years. Let's start a new battle.
Come on everyone, take up the charge...
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Explore. Dream. Discover.
"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowliness. Sail away from the safe harbour. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover." ~Mark Twain
Read it once and associate it with your goal.
Read it again and associate it with your love.
Read it yet again and associate it with your life.
Explore.Dream.Discover. ~ Your goal
It might take you a long time before you win in any undertaking. You might have to let go of all your luxuries and joys. You might be faced by a myriad of trying situations. But under all circumstances you need to stay focused, stay true to your commitments and not give up. For every man can dream but to make that dream a reality very few have the courage and willpower.
Explore. Explore your goal. Seek the answer for yourself, what do you want to be and why.
Dream. Never let go of the vision you have in your mind. Think about it all the time and believe that it can be done.
Discover. Things might not always work out as you plan and to accept defeat would be the easiest thing to do. But don't give up, discover your inner potential, remember an indomitable spirit and determination could not be defeated by circumstances. Question yourself everyday, when you look in the mirror, "Will you give up or will you try?"
Read it once and associate it with your goal.
Read it again and associate it with your love.
Read it yet again and associate it with your life.
Explore.Dream.Discover. ~ Your goalIt might take you a long time before you win in any undertaking. You might have to let go of all your luxuries and joys. You might be faced by a myriad of trying situations. But under all circumstances you need to stay focused, stay true to your commitments and not give up. For every man can dream but to make that dream a reality very few have the courage and willpower.
Explore. Explore your goal. Seek the answer for yourself, what do you want to be and why.
Dream. Never let go of the vision you have in your mind. Think about it all the time and believe that it can be done.
Discover. Things might not always work out as you plan and to accept defeat would be the easiest thing to do. But don't give up, discover your inner potential, remember an indomitable spirit and determination could not be defeated by circumstances. Question yourself everyday, when you look in the mirror, "Will you give up or will you try?"
Explore.Dream.Discover. ~ Your Life
Life is a journey, embrace it. "Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving."-Albert Einstein
Life is a journey, embrace it. "Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving."-Albert Einstein
Explore. Each one of us is born with unique qualities and capabilities which we need to identify and nurture. Very few people can make their potential into reality, others barely manage to go beyond their survival issues. Find the deeper inner purpose of your lives, find something in life that is worth giving your life for.
Dream. Their are people who pursue their dreams and their are people who pursue excuses. Pursue your dreams to live a meaningful life. Listen to your inner voice. Visualize your dreams and forgo your fears. Grasp the opportunities, do not wait for them to come knocking. Remember that it is only when you dare the impossible, you could make it possible.
Discover. You are what you think you are. Your deeds determine who you are and it shapes your destiny. Once you have discovered the purpose of your life, you should be prepared for a struggle. You might lack the courage to face the unknown and fear leaving a secure job for an uncertain future but you must not succumb to the trap of security. If you give up to something that you are not willing to, something which is not your plan for life, you lack faith in yourself and you lack faith in the Almighty. Believe in yourself.
Dream. Their are people who pursue their dreams and their are people who pursue excuses. Pursue your dreams to live a meaningful life. Listen to your inner voice. Visualize your dreams and forgo your fears. Grasp the opportunities, do not wait for them to come knocking. Remember that it is only when you dare the impossible, you could make it possible.
Discover. You are what you think you are. Your deeds determine who you are and it shapes your destiny. Once you have discovered the purpose of your life, you should be prepared for a struggle. You might lack the courage to face the unknown and fear leaving a secure job for an uncertain future but you must not succumb to the trap of security. If you give up to something that you are not willing to, something which is not your plan for life, you lack faith in yourself and you lack faith in the Almighty. Believe in yourself.
Explore. Dream. Discover.
Monday, March 1, 2010
Thursday, February 11, 2010
ShivSena vs SRK -- Defeat of the ugly politics
Before I start, just to let you know that I was agitated in the morning by the way things were shaping up. My adrenaline was running high and I decided to go out there and watch the movie whatsoever be my fate.
Also I would like to let you know what the word Terrorist means, to let you better decide who all are the terrorists, internal and external:
Terrorists - A radical who employs terror as a political weapon; usually organizes with other terrorists in small cells; often uses religion as a cover for terrorist activities.
I read Mr Uddhav Thackrey's statement that the stir is spontaneous. He questioned CM Ashok Chavan "Why the government never showed this alacrity when thousands of farmers committed suicide in Maharashtra?" Valid, a very valid question but let me also ask you Mr Uddhav and Mr Balasaheb why was there no stir then, why didn't the Shivseniks stopped the thousands of farmers from committing suicide? Are you good only at destruction? Have you ever done anything constructive?
India is at less danger from the foreign terrorists when we have the likes of Shivsena, MNS, VHP in the nation itself. Terrorists take advantage of the 'internal terror' unleashed by forces like Shiv Sena. I hope the Sena realises this. Violating law and order and fanning communal passions invite external forces to disrupt our entire system. Nobody denies their right to hold peaceful agitation within the framework of the Constitution. Will the people see the obvious that these political parties have no intention of goodwill but just politicing trivial issues to gain political mileage. They have got no point to prove, to terrorize is their only motive and they have the goons mistitled 'Seniks' to vandalize and rampage shops, malls, homes. It is kind of a repeated question that is being asked by any citizen that -- we are politicians and we are going to do whatever we feel right, what can you do about it.
To this the citizens rallied and declared that "we will not be terrorised by some people who want to curb our fundamental rights." It does not matter whether we come from within the country or from a foreign country. Thousands of citizens of Mumbai and Maharashtra expressed their desire individually to defend our freedom.
By the end of the day I was relieved by the people's courageous act, their verdict - We are capable of deciding WHO IS GOOD and WHO IS BAD. Hats off to SRK and the People, for it was not just that the hero stood up for a cause but with him stood the people. I cannot stop myself from humming, "Kitne baju kitne sir ginle dushman dhyan se, haarega tu har baazi jab khele hum ji jaan se".
Also I would like to let you know what the word Terrorist means, to let you better decide who all are the terrorists, internal and external:
Terrorists - A radical who employs terror as a political weapon; usually organizes with other terrorists in small cells; often uses religion as a cover for terrorist activities.
I read Mr Uddhav Thackrey's statement that the stir is spontaneous. He questioned CM Ashok Chavan "Why the government never showed this alacrity when thousands of farmers committed suicide in Maharashtra?" Valid, a very valid question but let me also ask you Mr Uddhav and Mr Balasaheb why was there no stir then, why didn't the Shivseniks stopped the thousands of farmers from committing suicide? Are you good only at destruction? Have you ever done anything constructive?
India is at less danger from the foreign terrorists when we have the likes of Shivsena, MNS, VHP in the nation itself. Terrorists take advantage of the 'internal terror' unleashed by forces like Shiv Sena. I hope the Sena realises this. Violating law and order and fanning communal passions invite external forces to disrupt our entire system. Nobody denies their right to hold peaceful agitation within the framework of the Constitution. Will the people see the obvious that these political parties have no intention of goodwill but just politicing trivial issues to gain political mileage. They have got no point to prove, to terrorize is their only motive and they have the goons mistitled 'Seniks' to vandalize and rampage shops, malls, homes. It is kind of a repeated question that is being asked by any citizen that -- we are politicians and we are going to do whatever we feel right, what can you do about it.
To this the citizens rallied and declared that "we will not be terrorised by some people who want to curb our fundamental rights." It does not matter whether we come from within the country or from a foreign country. Thousands of citizens of Mumbai and Maharashtra expressed their desire individually to defend our freedom.
By the end of the day I was relieved by the people's courageous act, their verdict - We are capable of deciding WHO IS GOOD and WHO IS BAD. Hats off to SRK and the People, for it was not just that the hero stood up for a cause but with him stood the people. I cannot stop myself from humming, "Kitne baju kitne sir ginle dushman dhyan se, haarega tu har baazi jab khele hum ji jaan se".
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
A continued battle... Life
The day I stepped out of my house, the corridor of comforts ended; I knew life is going to be tough. Life places obstacles at every move that you make and it is very well said that "Obstacles in life are not to be boggled at but to be surmounted."
Every person in his/her life faces struggles, you can't say I don't wanna fight anymore until you are alive. The good thing is that you don't have to go through this battle alone. In your childhood, you have your parents; in youth your friends and then you get the option to choose your soulmate(wooh that word in itself says a lot). I look at my dad and feel how incomplete he would have been had he not found mom, how he would have faced the world without her at his side. I look at my nana-nani and feel what a support they had been to each other, the courage that they had facing all the hardships of life and now they are past their golden age by over a decade but still they have not given up. My nana-nani still work round the clock without complains and say sitting idle rusts their body and mind. I took my life's lessons from them.
I want to be someone and for that I had to begin the battle of life early but I missed on it. I had some negative outcomes. God gave me another chance, he gave me a new beginning and now I cannot give up. I have to move on and fight and have faith, I'll have to lit the fire that will brighten the dark nights. Things are still uncertain, I have no hand to hold but I'll overcome the pain in my heart until I have this vision to move on.
Life is a continued battle for me and I'll fight with all my strength and enjoy the little moments of triumph that come by my side but I won't give up and I won't even die....
Every person in his/her life faces struggles, you can't say I don't wanna fight anymore until you are alive. The good thing is that you don't have to go through this battle alone. In your childhood, you have your parents; in youth your friends and then you get the option to choose your soulmate(wooh that word in itself says a lot). I look at my dad and feel how incomplete he would have been had he not found mom, how he would have faced the world without her at his side. I look at my nana-nani and feel what a support they had been to each other, the courage that they had facing all the hardships of life and now they are past their golden age by over a decade but still they have not given up. My nana-nani still work round the clock without complains and say sitting idle rusts their body and mind. I took my life's lessons from them.
I want to be someone and for that I had to begin the battle of life early but I missed on it. I had some negative outcomes. God gave me another chance, he gave me a new beginning and now I cannot give up. I have to move on and fight and have faith, I'll have to lit the fire that will brighten the dark nights. Things are still uncertain, I have no hand to hold but I'll overcome the pain in my heart until I have this vision to move on.
Life is a continued battle for me and I'll fight with all my strength and enjoy the little moments of triumph that come by my side but I won't give up and I won't even die....
Monday, January 4, 2010
The Mirror Smiles!!!!
"My days are all so brightened, My dreams are all so sweet. When I look at the face in the mirror, The face in the mirror smiles at Me."
I am just a one me who still is looking at the world with surprise. The One who has just few ambitions, the One who has just few dreams; the One who can fall down, get hurt, cry and ask God why. My ambitions and my dreams may be termed as trivial or overblown by some, but those are my dreams, my ambitions and to me they are everything.
The New Year has arrived bringing new fragrance in my life.
God has come to me in a special way to tell me that you are my child.
He has absolved me of all my sins, He has exonerated me from all my lies.
He has told me that I love you and I like you the way you are.
I was afraid of facing the mirror before, the face in the mirror was all so wry.
But when I look at the mirror today, the face in the mirror SMILES!!!!
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